If You Are Contemplating Suicide…

If you think your life is spiraling downhill, out of control, and you feel like you can’t go on, I want you to know that suicide is not the way out!!! I beg you not to do it! Your life is worth fighting for! And I am fighting for you right now—I am praying for you.

I want you to know that I’ve been there before. I felt like nothing. Felt extremely bad about where I was in life. Felt worthless. Felt ashamed. Guilty. And too embarrassed to tell someone how I was really feeling on the inside. I was down. And I mean all the way down. I was done! Had enough. And I felt like I couldn’t TAKE IT ANYMORE!

So, I left the house. Tears streaming down my face. Didn’t have the strength to look back at my husband and one-year old son before I closed the door.

Got in my car and just drove…

Ended up in a Target parking lot…

Called my best friend. Told him I couldn’t do this anymore…

Balling crying…Could barely breathe…I felt like a complete loser…didn’t even have the courage to explain to him my intentions that night…but I did.

Then he and his wife started to pray for me. And as they prayed, the tears came, came, and came…and they wouldn’t stop. I felt so weak. Could barely hear the words they were speaking to me. All I know is I couldn’t go through with it. The phone call ended. All I remember from that moment was them speaking life back into my spirit…through prayer.

Somehow, I made it home later that night. Cried myself to sleep. And somehow, I knew that I could make it…because I woke up the next morning.

Looking back, it was a dark period in my life. Over and over, I asked where was God? I could not feel His presence. Felt like He had abandoned me…left me. Why would God allow all these bad things to happen in my life if He cared for me like He said He did? I was mad. Angry. Frustrated. All that…

Yet, He kept me. Cared enough to use my best friends as vessels to pray me through…reminding me how much I am loved and cared for. The Lord heard and answered their prayers that night. And I am grateful. Grateful for God’s grace and mercy.

And today, as tears rush down my face as I type, I am praying for you. I want you to know that The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. I am telling you that God cares about you and your situation. Self-help books and stuff are good but nothing can compare to prayer and crying out to God for help. He hears and God cares. If He can save my life, God can save yours!

Let me go on to tell you about my homegirl. I met this beautiful woman of God at a prayer meeting. We instantly connected and decided to meet up later in the week for a bite to eat. Do you know that over dinner, she shared her story…told me about how she had almost lost her life as a child on several occasions and survived? Yet, as an adult she, too had a dark period in her life which led her to try to take her own life. BUT, God!

He allowed her to survive! The Lord saved her life AGAIN! You wanna why? ‘Cause there is purpose for her being here!

As she shared her testimony, I remember crying. Not ‘cause I could relate, but because I could not fathom the idea of her not being here. I knew the moment of us meeting that she was powerful. Smart.  Articulate and passionate. Anointed. I could not believe she also had a moment of despair…which could have ultimately cost her her life.

I am thankful to God that she is still here! I don’t know how rich my life would have been these past 9 months of being her friend. Man, she is like a sister to me. We talk every day. Pray all the time together. We spend hours and hours talking about life and how good God has been to us. We dream together about the future! I am excited for what God is doing in her life…she out here makin’ moves and I am extremely proud of her. So, why am I saying all of this?

I’ve been led the past two weeks to pray for you. Yes, you reading this. And if this is not your struggle, I am praying for someone who is connected to you who may be on the edge of giving up. I want you to know that God loves you so much. He sent His only son, Jesus, to die for you. Jesus came to proclaim good news to the poor, to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion—to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. I want you to know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. I want you to know that no temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.

God loves You so much! And so do I! If you need prayer or have any specific requests please reach out to me via the contact page above. I encourage you to trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths!

God is faithful!

LIVE my friend! YOUR LIFE IS VALUABLE! THE WORLD NEEDS YOU! God has a great plan for your life: For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

The best is yet to come for you! I declare it in Jesus’ name! Put your hope and trust in the Lord!

With Love, MrsMKauthor

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:37-39 (NIV)

***I dedicate this post to my best friends (J & M) for being there for me all these years–I am grateful for you. And to my homey, my ace, my sister, and warrior for Christ (A.P.) God Bless You…cheers to 7/11! Shout-outs to my husband who read this and asked, “Where my name at?” LOL

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